This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any actual resemblance to persons or historical persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
The Dukes of Hazzard characters, settings, locales, ect. are owned by other entities who have not endorsed this fic nor have they given express permission for the character's use. Author makes not claims to these characters and is not making any profit from their use.
All original characters are the property of the author.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise), without the prior written permission of the author or any legally assigned agents of the author.
© Copyright: 1996-2004. Lisa Philbrick
The Dukes of Hazzard
Big Trouble, Little Package
By: Lisa Philbrick
Well friends and neighbors for once trouble didn't arrive in Hazzard County in a armored truck.
Bo and Luke drove into town in the General Lee. As they went by the bank they saw an armored truck. "Boss has MaryAnne working today," Luke observed, watching MaryAnne watch the two armored guards carry money bags into the bank.
"Wise choice. Maybe for once we won't have trouble come in a armored truck," Bo said.
It won't Bo, I just said that.
Instead it's going to come in a much smaller package.
After the armored truck pulled away from the curb MaryAnne went inside the bank.
Boss was just coming out of the vault. "All right," he said as he shut the door and locked it.
"Well, that was easy," MaryAnne said as she came down the few stpes inside the back and approached Boss, Rosco and Enos. "Is there anything else you need me to do Rosco?"
"No. After we finish here, Enos and I are going to do our regular patrols,"
"No, you're not," Boss cut in. "At least, you're not," he said to Rosco. "I need you to stay here."
"Looks like I do the patrol," MaryAnne said. "You ready Enos?"
"Yeah," Enos said and followed MaryAnne out of the bank.
"Boss, what'd you need me to stay her for?" Rosco asked.
"Because I have a shipment of stereo equipment coming in and I need you to help me make sure I received everything I ordered."
"Oh," Rosco replied. "Are we going to listen to Loretta Lynn records on 'em?"
"No, you idiot. We're going to sell them," he said as he and Rosco left out the back door of the bank.
"Oh! Khee, khee!" Rosco said, knowing that selling them meant that he may get some money.
Out front, MaryAnne was double checking her patrol route with Enos.
"So it's the Mill Road, all the way to Route 6 and then double back down 210?" she said.
"Right. The Sheriff usually sets up a speed trap on Route 6 for a couple of hours," he said apologetically.
"Oh Enos I'm not doin' no speed trap," MaryAnne said. "Especially with some of Boss' ridiculous laws." She walked to her patrol car. "Of course you don't need to tell him that okay? It'll be our little secret."
Enos smiled. "Okay," he said, "see you later."
"You bet," MaryAnne said and got into the patrol car. She waved to Enos and drove away.
"Well Bandit," she said as she drove out of town, "here we are on our first Hazzard county patrol. Try not to get too excited."
"Woof!" the German Shepherd responded.
While traveling on the Mill Road, MaryAnne saw a brown sedan pulled over to the side of the road, two men standing around and a baby in a car seat on the ground.
"What's going on here?" MaryAnne wondered. She pulled to the side of the road in front of the brown sedan.
"Just stay calm," one of the men growled to the other.
MaryAnne got out of her car and left the door open.
"Everything okay here?" she asked.
"Everything's fine," the shorter of the two men answered quickly.
Being an experienced law enforcement officer, MaryAnne could tell she had stumbled on to something she shouldn't have and that that baby was in danger.
"Well, are you broke down?" She gestured to the car.
Both men responded at the same time, one saying 'no' the other 'yes'.
"What my friend means," the tall one said, "is that we are broke down but we've called for a tow truck."
MaryAnne nodded and looked at the car again. She saw no CB antenna and the nearest telephone was twelve miles away. She then looked down at the baby.
"Belong to one of you?"
"Yes," the tall one said, "it's my daughter."
"What's she doing on the ground?"
"Well, it's hot in the car and I didn't want to place her on the trunk because she might fall off."
"Listen, maybe I should stay with you 'till that tow truck arrives," she said.
The short one was getting edgy now.
"That's really not necessary," the tall one said. "I think we can manage."
"Well, that may be, but I don't want to be the cause of a lawsuit filed by your wife against the Hazzard County Sheriff's Department because the baby got injured or killed waiting by the side of the road like this."
The short one lost it at this point. He withdrew his gun.
"Well now that's just a chance we're going to have to take," he said.
"Oh, now mister I can understand a mother's protective instinct but there's no need for that," and she lunged toward him and wrestled him to the ground.
"Bandit!" she screamed, and the big German shepherd bolted out of the patrol car and came to MaryAnne's rescue. After wrestling the gun away, MaryAnne threw it into the woods. While Bandit kept the two men busy, MaryAnne grabbed the baby and bolted to the patrol car.
"Come on, Bandit," she called and the German shepherd returned to the car. As soon as he was in, MaryAnne floored it.
"Come on!" the tall man yelled at the short on who was looking for the gun. "We've gotta get that baby back."
The short one found the gun and both men got into the brown sedan and took off after MaryAnne. After a while they caught up with her. The short man leaned out the passenger window and took a shot at the patrol car.
MaryAnne flinched. The baby started crying.
"Oh lord," MaryAnne said. Having not had time to strap the car seat in MaryAnne had to hold on to it with one hand and drive with the other. Now was the time she needed both hands.
"Bandit, I need you to hold this," she said tapping the car seat. The German shepherd was sitting on the floor with his upper body on the seat. Bandit responded by placing a paw over the baby.
"That's it," MaryAnne said. "Don't let her fall."
MaryAnne grabbed the steering wheel with both hands as more gun shots were fired.
"What have I gotten my self into?" she said and picked up the CB mike.
"This is Deputy MaryAnne Coltrane calling Sheriff Rosco Coltrane. I need assistance. Come back."
Unfortunately, Rosco was at the warehouse with Boss where the stereo equipment was being delivered, and his radio wasn't turned up loud enough.
"Rosco, this is your cousin MaryAnne. A lady in distress. A lady with a baby. I've got two guys shooting at me and I need help."
Enos, however, did hear MaryAnne's call. He picked up his CB mike. "MaryAnne, this is Enos. Where are you?"
"Enos! Thank God. I'm on Mill Road just past the railroad crossing. I don't have time to explain but I've got a baby with me and two guys shootin' at me. You better hurry up if you want to find out more."
"I'm on my way," Enos said and swung his patrol car around and raced off in the opposite direction towards Mill Road.
Back in town, the boys were about to find out about the baby too.
Outside of Rhuebottoms General Store, Bo and Luke had just finished putting a box of supplies in the trunk of the General Lee and closed the lid when they noticed a young woman walking along kind of aimlessly and crying.
"Hey, Luke," Bo said and gestured to toward the woman.
"Let's see what's wrong," Luke replied.
The boys approached the young woman who's clothes they noticed were covered with dirt.
"Are you okay, Miss?" Bo asked.
The woman jumped at the sound of Bo's voice and swung around facing the two cousins.
"My baby," she sobbed, "they kidnapped my baby."
"Who kidnapped your baby?" Luke asked.
"Two men," she said, "they're working for my ex-boyfriend. They tried to get me too but I got away and I shouldn't have. They're going to kill my baby."
"When did this happen?" Bo asked.
"Just a little while ago. On a road just outside of town."
"Come on, we'll take you to the police," Luke said.
"Yeah," Bo said. "Oh, by the way, my name is Bo and this is my cousin Luke."
"Sarah Jacobs," the woman said, and Bo and Luke escorted her to the police station.
Meanwhile, out on Mill Road, Enos had caught up with MaryAnne and the brown sedan.
"Let's get out of here Eddie, there's more cops," the short man with the gun said. "We'll get both the baby and Sarah after Marcello talks to the local boss."
Eddie nodded and disengaged his pursuit of MaryAnne. He pulled on to a side road and was not followed by Enos.
MaryAnne pulled over after seeing the brown sedan quit its pursuit. Enos pulled up behind her. He scrambled out of his patrol car and ran to hers.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"Yes, Enos, thank you, " she replied with a relieved smile. She got out of the patrol car and went around to the passenger side.
"I don't know what those two men were up to," she said opening the passenger door, "but this baby sure as heck don't belong to either one of them." She secured the car seat with the seat belt and then let Bandit out before closing the door.
"So what happened?" Enos asked as MaryAnne let Bandit get into the back seat.
So MaryAnne explained to Enos how she found the baby and then they headed back to town, where Bo and Luke and the young woman were not having any luck finding an officer of the law.
"I'm sorry, Sarah," Bo said, "I just don't understand why there's nobody here."
"Well, we know Rosco is where ever Boss is," Luke said, "Enos is probably on patrol and MaryAnne could be anywhere."
"Yeah. Well, maybe if we wait a little bit somebody will show up," Bo said, as Luke went to the window.
"We won't have to wait long," Luke said as he saw MaryAnne and Enos pull up in front of the police station.
Sarah came up beside Luke to see for herself. She saw MaryAnne remove the baby from the car seat and Enos take the car seat from the car.
"My baby!" she exclaimed. "They found her!" She ran from the window and out of the booking room with Bo and Luke behind her and met up with MaryAnne and Enos on the stairs outside.
"Oh you found her!" Sarah exclaimed, taking the baby from MaryAnne.
MaryAnne let the woman take the baby but was looking at Bo and Luke for some kind of answer.
"Thank you so much," Sarah blurted before one of the boys could say anything. She looked at MaryAnne and then did a double take.
"MaryAnne?" she said.
MaryAnne looked at the woman for a moment. "Sarah!" she exclaimed. The two embraced like the old friends they were.
"And this," MaryAnne pointed to the baby, "has to be Laura Ann."
"Yes. Oh I couldn't have asked for a better person to bring back my baby," Sarah said.
"You two know each other?" Luke asked.
"Yeah," MaryAnne replied. "We were friends in high school over in Finchburg County. But," she looked at Sarah, "last I knew, you were in Atlanta."
"Yeah," Sarah said, "and I ran into some trouble."
"So you know the two men who had your baby?" MaryAnne asked.
"Yeah. They work for my ex-boyfriend, Brian Marcello."
"Bri-- Brian Marcello?" MaryAnne queried. "The Brian Macello?"
"The one and only."
"You really are in trouble aren't ya?"
"Yeah. I should've just stayed a country girl."
"Well, those two guys took a couple of pot shots at me," MaryAnne said. "I have a feeling they may be back and don't think we should be standing out in the open like this."
"Well, let's go out to the farm," Luke said. "We should be safe there long enough to figure out how to help you out."
Now ain't that just like the Dukes? They've just met her and already they're offering to help.
As Uncle Jesse brought a tray of coffee into the living room, Sarah began her story.
"After high school, I went to Atlanta because I wanted to get out of Finchburg County." She took a cup form the coffee tray. "Thank you."
"That was all she talked about in high school," MaryAnne added.
"Yeah. Well Atlanta is a big city for a lonely ol' country girl. But I had my wits about me and I learned to survive. I got a job as a waitress in this fancy restaurant and that's where I met Brian Marcello. I didn't know he was a mobster but I fell in love and
we dated for a couple of years. Then I became pregnant, and I found out who he really was." She paused for a moment. "He demanded I have an abortion. I refused, and then he started threatening me so I fled. I went to Nashville and stayed with a friend. You remember Becky Sue Hamilton, don't you MaryAnne?"
"Oh yeah. I didn't know she was in Nashville."
"Her singing career?" Sarah said.
"Oh. Yeah," MaryAnne giggled.
"Anyways, I was able to stay in Nashville long enough to give birth to Laura Ann. Not long after though some of Brian's thugs found me so I fled again and came back to Finchburg County. I was able to stay in Finchburg for a couple of months before they found me again. They chased me here to Hazzard and got Laura Ann but I got away. Y'all know the rest."
"Yeah," MaryAnne said, "and when I see Rosco again I'm going to wring his neck."
Bo chuckled. "Why?" he asked.
"Because after I got Laura Ann away from those two men and they were chasing after me and shootin' at me, I was screaming for Rosco on the CB but he didn't respond, the dipstick. I'd like to tell him what he can do with that badge," she said. "Give it to me."
"Rosco?" Sarah said. "Your cousin Rosco? The one who inspired you to go into law enforcement?"
"Yeah," MaryAnne said, rolling her eyes. "What was I thinking? Anyways, why didn't you tell me any of this in your letters? All this time I thought you were in Atlanta getting ready for marriage or something. Why didn't you tell me you were in trouble?
You know the entire Finchburg County Sheriff's department would have helped."
"All six of you?"
"Well, that's more than you've got now here in Hazzard."
Sarah sighed. "I know MaryAnne, but I was so scared I didn't know what to do. It seemed like every time I'd turn around there'd be two guys after me," she said and then paused. "Brian wants me dead, MaryAnne."
"Dead?" Daisy gasped. "What for?"
"I guess he's afraid I know too much about his 'business' dealings," Sarah replied.
"Do you?" Luke asked.
"Well...I don't know. I guess I know somehtings but I don't know if its enough for him to want me dead."
"Either way," Luke said. "We've got to figure out a way to keep him and his cronies from finding you."
"Well that's easy," Jesse said, "she can stay right here."
"Oh, but I couldn't possibly intrude..."
"Intrude?" Jesse repeated. "Nonsense. You can stay here as long as you need to."
"But I can't stay here forever," Sarah said.
"You won't have to," MaryAnne said, "'cause I'm sure Luke here, if not all of us, are gonna think of a way to get you out of this."
Well I hope they think of something soon, 'cause look who just came into town.
Brian Marcello arrived in Hazzard in a black Cadillac sedan. Young, dark haired and good looking, he was part of the next generation of mafia leaders and he fit the bill perfectly. He met with his two associates, Eddie and Dan, just across the street from the police station.
"A female deputy got the baby," Eddie explained, "over there is her patrol car, but we haven't seen her since we got here."
"Is the local boss here?" Marcello asked.
"Yeah, he just went in with the Sheriff a little while ago," Eddie said.
"All right, now we're going to go in there and ask for their assistance in locating the baby and Sarah. I'll do all the talking, you two just smile and nod."
"Yes, sir," Eddie said. The three men then entered the police station.
On the opposite side of Hazzard Square, Daisy pulled up in front of the emporium. MaryAnne was in the passenger seat of the Jeep and had changed out of her police uniform and into a pair of white shorts and a long-sleeved red and white plaid shirt
borrowed from Daisy.
"There it is," MaryAnne said pointing to the brown sedan. "I knew they'd come back and I know they're looking for me."
"What about that black car?" Daisy asked.
"That's probably Marcello. He may be asking Boss for help in finding Sarah. Maverick's in the impound. Wait for me here."
MaryAnne climbed out of the Jeep and scooted over to the impound. She slipped in and went to the blue Firebird. After starting it up she carefully drove out of the impound yard and back where Daisy was waiting.
* * *
"Well, Mr. Marcello," Boss was saying after greetings were exchanged, "what brings you to Hazzard County?"
"I was hoping you and your sheriffs' department could help me in locating a young woman named Sarah Jacobs and a baby."
"Why do you want to find her?" Boss asked.
"Well, Miss Jacobs is my wife and we had a little disagreement and she took off. Now my two associates here, found her here in Hazzard with the baby and were able to get the baby but Sarah fled again. Then one of your deputies apparently got a little too overzealous and took the baby from my two associates."
Boss frowned. "Which deputy?"
"A female?" Brian said.
"Oh that's easy," Rosco said. "That's MaryAnne."
"I know that," Boss spat. He looked at Marcello. "Well, perhaps Miss Coltrane felt that your two associates here were a threat to the baby."
"That's possible," Marcello replied, "but she merely overreacted to the situation she found my two associates and the baby in. Now, I do not wish to cause any trouble, I merely wish for the safe return of my wife and my daughter."
"The thing is," Boss said, "you're asking me to devote all the manpower of my sheriffs department to looking for your wife. Now Hazzard is just a small town but we do have our share of problems and I can't just put the entire department on one case."
Marcello motioned to Eddie who handed him a briefcase. Marcello put the briefcase on Boss' desk, opened it and removed a few stacks of money.
"Would $25,000 compensate?" Brian asked, holding the stacks in his hand for Boss to see.
Boss' eyes went wide. "Twenty-five..." he stopped short. "Oh yes, that will do just fine." He reached for the money.
Brian pulled his hand away. "Ah-ah," he said and then went over to the paper cutter on the far side of Boss' office. He then proceeded to cut the five stacks of fifty, $100 bills in half. When he finished he returned to Boss' desk and dropped five of the half stacks on the desk.
"You'll get the rest when you find her," Brian explained to Boss' shock. He placed the other halves in the briefcase. "Now I would suppose your Sheriff here will need a description of my wife?"
* * *
MaryAnne and Daisy watched the brown sedan and black Cadillac leave Hazzard Square. With MaryAnne being in a different car and out of uniform, Eddie and Dan didn't recognize her. After Marcello and his associates were out of town, MaryAnne's CB crackled to life.
"This is Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane calling Deputy MaryAnne Coltrane. You got your ears on? Come on."
MaryAnne didn't immediately respond and gazed around Hazzard Square and up to the sky listening to Rosco repeat his call several times.
"MaryAnne, this is you supreme, superior officer talkin' to ya. Whatcha doin' out there? Powdering your nose?"
MaryAnne picked up the mike. "Hardly," she snapped in reply. "What can I do for ya, Sheriff?"
"Listen, did you by any chance pick up a baby from two men in a brown sedan earlier today?"
"Depends. Why do you want you know?"
"Well, a fellow named Brian Marcello is looking for her."
"Oh. Is he by any chance looking for a young woman named Sarah Jacobs as well?"
"Yeah. How'd you know that?"
"Rosco, do you know who Brian Marcello is?"
MaryAnne rolled her eyes. "Do you ever look at the wanted posters that we have hanging up?"
"Of course I do," Rosco said. "I'd know any of those faces if I saw them again."
"Apprently this one slipped your mind. Why don't you take another look?"
Rosco left the radio and went over to the wanted posters that hung behind the desk. He took a moment to find Marcello and when he did he took it off the wall. He read it and then went back to the radio. "It says here he's wanted for racketeering, loan sharking and...murder?" Rosco said.
"That's right. And I can tell you right now, he doesn't want Sarah and the baby safely returned. He wants them dead."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure and yes, I did pick up the baby. But these two men chased after me and shot at me, which you would know about if you were anywhere near your radio this morning. If you don't believe me, and you should because I'm your kin and I wouldn't lie to ya, but if you don't, ask Enos, he's the one who helped me fend them off."
"She's right, Sheriff," Enos cut in from somewhere on his patrol route, "those two men were shootin' at her."
"Now I hope you and Boss think twice about what you're about to do," MaryAnne said, "which is be accessories to murder."
Well that put ol' Roscos knickers into a tight enough knot he told Boss what MaryAnne had told him, which put ol' Boss' knickers into an even tighter knot.
"Murder?" Boss said. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah. He's gonna kill her. And the baby."
"Good lord. Whatever for?"
"Well, MaryAnne said that this young lady may know some things about his dealings he doesn't want her to know."
"Is that so? Well then we're going to have to make sure he doesn't find her."
"But Boss, what about that $25,000?"
"Rosco! How can you think of such a thing when two young innocent lives are at stake?" Boss scolded. "Violence is a terrible way to make money."
If there is any redeeming quality about Boss Hogg, it's the fact that he don't like no one to get hurt in order for him to turn a dishonest dollar. MaryAnne and Daisy had returned to the farm to tell everyone that Marcello
and his associates were in town and had talked to Boss.
"Oh no, not Brian too," Sarah said.
"Yeah," MaryAnne said, "he apparently asked Boss for help in finding you and Laura Ann. However, I talked to Rosco and I think I was able to convince him that Marcello doesn't necessarily want you safely returned."
"And ol' Boss isn't one for violence so we know we don't have to worry about him finding you and turning you over to Marcello," Luke said.
"But what do we do about Marcello?" Bo asked.
"Well, the first thing we've got to do is call the FBI in Atlanta and tell them what's goin' on," Luke said. "We should probably also figure out what Sarah knows about Marcello's dealings because the Feds may want to know that too."
"Assuming it's anything important," Sarah said. "All I know is what I overheard in a conversation Brian had with some guy named Lenny Kovax."
"Lenny Kovax?" MaryAnne said. "Are you sure it was Lenny Kovax?"
"Who's Lenny Kovax?" Bo asked.
"Typical mobster," MaryAnne said. "Illegal booze, prostitution, loansharking and illegal firearms. Feds have been trying to catch him for years." She turned to Sarah. "What did you hear?"
"I think it had something to do with him and Brian combining their loan deals or something like that. And something about firearms. A shipment of firearms. Oh I can't remember any details MaryAnne."
"That's okay, you've got a more pressing problem now. But what you know is important." MaryAnne looked at Luke. "Now how do we get Marcello?"
"Well, we know that he and those two dudes you told us about are going to be looking for you," he pointed to MaryAnne. "What we can do is put you out in the open and have him find you and have him think you're leading him to Sarah and Laura Ann."
"When I'll actually be leading him somewhere else to be caught."
"Exactly. I figure we'll use the old Hoover place. There's a lot of places where we can hide people and cars and be able to keep a watch on the house."
"We should probably get Rosco and Enos too," MaryAnne said. "And let Boss know what's happening as well."
"Yeah," Luke said.
"Wait a minute," Sarah said. "MaryAnne are you crazy? You're going to put yourself out in the open for Brian to find? What makes you think he won't try to get my supposed location out of you an then kill you."
"Well I don't think he'd be that stupid. Murdering an officer in the line of duty is a capital offense," MaryAnne explained.
"Besides, me and Bo will be following her to make sure she's all right," Luke said.
"Yeah," MaryAnne said. "I'm telling you Sarah there's no better insurance than Duke insurance."
As long as it's not complicated by Duke luck.
Well, Uncle Jesse called the FBI in Atlanta and they talked to Sarah and determined she knew enough for them to send a couple of agents. MaryAnne contacted Boss, Rosco and Enos and told them what was happening and what they had to do and Bo and Luke then showed MaryAnne how to get to the old Hoover farm. MaryAnne then changed back into her uniform and the boys followed her to town. Now y'all hang on, this could get a might hairy.
MaryAnne hid Maverick in the alley while the Duke boys parked in front of the emporium so they could keep an eye on her.
Before leaving the alley, MaryAnne looked around Hazzard Square for the brown sedan. She spotted it over by the bank and then waved to Bo and Luke to signal that the sedan was in town.
"There's the signal," Luke said and he and Bo watched MaryAnne walk out of the alley and towards the police station.
"Hey," Dan said. "Isn't that her?" He pointed at MaryAnne as she crossed the street.
"Yeah," Eddie replied and started the car. He floored it and cut off MaryAnne before she reached the other side of the street.
MaryAnne jumped back from the car as it cut in front of her.
Eddie pointed his gun at her. "Get in," he snapped.
MaryAnne got in the back seat and the sedan tore out of Hazzard Square followed by the General Lee. The boys followed behind far enough so as not to be seen by Eddie and Dan.
"They're not taking her to the Hoover place," Bo observed.
"They're taking her to Marcello first," Luke said.
The boys followed the sedan to Boss Hogg's old grits mill. After hiding the General they watched from the bushes as MaryAnne was led inside by Eddie and Dan.
"You don't think they'll try to hurt her do you?" Bo asked.
"Not while we're here," Luke said and waving a finger at Bo he began to quietly sneak down to the mill.
Bo and Luke could hear Marcello as they came up to a window. Peering in they could see MaryAnne sitting in a chair, Eddie and Dan standing with their backs to the window and Marcello marching back and forth in front of MaryAnne, holding her gun,
which Eddie had taken before they came in.
MaryAnne caught a glimpse of the boys while Marcello continued his speech.
"That was a very stupid thing you did this morning," he said.
"Idiocy knows no gender boundary," MaryAnne replied.
"You gotta smart mouth don't ya? Did they teach you that at the police academy?"
"Let's knock off the small talk, Marcello. You didn't have me brought out here for a discussion on my police training so what do you want?"
"I want that baby and Sarah Jacobs."
"And what if I told you that they don't want you."
Marcello stopped his pacing and looked at her. "Then you do know where they are."
"Oh come now. Of course you know where they are. You just said so."
"Well, maybe I do and maybe I don't. Why you wanna know?"
"Because I want them back."
"That's really none of your business."
"I can make it my business."
Marcello paused. "Miss Coltrane, I would recommend in your own best interest that you tell me where they are, especially if you value your life."
MaryAnne snorted. "Oh right, like you're gonna kill me if I don't tell you."
"No, I'm not going to kill you," Marcello said. He approached her and leaned to her so his face was a few inches from hers. "But I will severely scar you for life and it won't necessarily be a physical scar."
MaryAnne was silent for a moment. "All right," she said. "I'll uh, I'll take you to where they are."
"Good. I knew you would see things my way."
Outside, Luke gestured to Bo for them to return to the bushes. From there they watched MaryAnne, Marcello and his two associates leave the grits mill and get into the brown sedan with MaryAnne at the wheel. After MaryAnne drove away, the boys went to the General and were soon following the sedan.
"Bo, you're too close. They're going to see us," Luke said.
"I'm not too close," Bo said.
"Yes you are, now back off."
Sitting in the passenger seat of the sedan, Marcello could see the General in his side mirror.
"Stop the car," he said.
"What?" MaryAnne said.
"I said stop the car."
MaryAnne brought the car to a stop.
"Bo!" Luke exclaimed seeing the brown sedan stopped in the road. The General skidded to a stop.
Marcello looked at MaryAnne. "Are those friends of yours back there?"
She looked in her rearview mirror and made a face that Marcello didn't see. "I do know who they are and I can tell you there just a couple of good ol' boys who watch too many cowboy movies. They probably saw your two lovely associates here pull a gun on me and force me into this car in town. Things like that tend to arouse their suspicion. Now if you had a CB radio could tell them to back off."
"We'll do better than that. You and I will tell them ourselves."
"Okie dokie," MaryAnne said. Both she and Marcello got of the car and walked to the General. MaryAnne leaned to see through the drivers window. Marcello stood behind her.
She winked before she spoke.
"You boys are trying to play hero again ain't ya? You saw what happened in town when I was forced into that car and you thought I was in some kind of trouble? Well, I ain't. I'm just fine. So why don't y'all skidattle back on home and help your cousin Daisy with the vacuuming and the house cleaning or something. I'll see y'all later."
"But MaryAnne..." Luke started to protest.
"Hush," MaryAnne said. "I'm fine okay? Now git!"
"All right," Luke said. "And we better see you later."
Bo put the General in reverse and backed up a bit. He then swung the car around and drove away in the opposite direction.
"Well," Bo said, "What do we do now?"
"Go to the old Hoover place and wait for her. That's what she just told us to do."
"Yeah. 'Help Daisy with the vacuuming?'"
When the General Lee was far enough down the road, Marcello and MaryAnne returned to the sedan.
"Any more stunts like that," Marcello said, "and you may not see your friends again."
MaryAnne paused in response and then put the sedan in gear and drove on to the Hoover place.
Now by this time those FBI agents were supposed to have arrived in Hazzard but for some reason they had failed to show.
After hiding the General, the boys found Uncle Jesse with Daisy and Sarah waiting in the bushes.
"What are you boys doing here?" Jesse asked. "You're supposed to be following MaryAnne."
"We were," Luke said, "but Marcello saw us. MaryAnne had to send us 'home.'" Luke looked around at the other hiding places. "Where are the FBI agents?"
"They ain't here yet," Jesse explained, "and they should have been by now."
"Great," Luke muttered. "Well they better be here soon because I don't see how we're going to pull this off with just Rosco and Enos."
Luke turned his head at the sound of tires crunching on gravel.
"It's MaryAnne," he said. "She's going to be suspecting FBI agents to come flying out of the closets and they ain't. Uncle Jesse, you and Sarah are going to have to go in and stall them. Some how, let MaryAnne know something's gone wrong."
"All right," Jesse said. He and Sarah then scurried to the back of the farm.
"Bo, you better get the bows and arrows out of the General."
"Right," Bo said and rushed off.
"Daisy, you better go tell Rosco and Enos we've made a slight change in plans. Here's what they've got to do..."
That boy does think fast don't he?
For those of you wondering why those FBI agents hadn't showed up at the Hoover place, well, they were having a hard time trying to find it.
Jesse and Sarah were waiting in what was once a kitchen when MaryAnne came in, followed by Marcello, Eddie and Dan.
Marcello had MaryAnne's gun trained on her.
"Sarah?" she called.
"In here, MaryAnne."
MaryAnne paused for a moment, knowing that Sarah wasn't supposed to be in the house. However, she proceeded to act normally and walked into the kitchen followed by Marcello while Eddie and Dan waited in the other room.
"Uh, Sarah, I know you're not going to like this, but Marcello found me and I didn't have much of choice."
Sarah was quiet for a moment. MaryAnne looked at Uncle Jesse for some kind of clue as to what they were doing in here.
"Well, MaryAnne," Sarah said, "you're right. I don't like this but I guess I can't hold it against you."
MaryAnne saw Uncle Jesses hand on the table and that his middle and ring finger were tucked under.
"Yeah," MaryAnne said. "I'm sorry, Sarah. I guess I wasn't much of a friend."
MaryAnne recognized finally that Jesse was giving her the old RidgeRunners distress signal. She winked to let him know she understood.
"You've always been a great friend, MaryAnne," Sarah said. "This isn't your fault."
"Alright," Marcello spat, "let's go Sarah. Where's the baby?"
"You may have me but you're not getting my baby."
Meanwhile outside, Rosco and Enos were quietly putting their patrol cars in position at the end of the driveway while Bo and Luke were preparing to go into the house.
"Remember," Luke said when Rosco and Enos had joined with him and Bo, "there's three unarmed people in there and Marcello and his dudes have guns."
"Yeah," Bo said.
"Wait a minute," Rosco said, "now I'm the superior commanding officer here, and I don't like this plan. What if they take hostages?"
"That's why I had you two bring the tear gas," Luke said. "If Marcello should try to hold hostages the gas will create enough of a diversion for MaryAnne and Jesse to get Sarah out of there. Don't you have faith in MaryAnne?"
"Of course I do," Rosco said. "She's a Coltrane."
"Alright." Luke smiled. "You ready, Bo?"
"Okay," Luke said and he and Bo proceeded to sneak into the house.
Eddie and Dan were standing in the living room facing the doorway to the kitchen. Bo and Luke had no trouble sneaking through the window. Quietly, they came up behind the two and hit them on the base of their necks. Marcello turned at the sound of Eddie and Dan falling to the floor, and saw Bo and Luke. He fired a shot at them but missed and hit the window above where Enos and Rosco were peering in.
"Doh!" Rosco exclaimed as he and Enos ducked.
Marcello grabbed Sarah who had been standing next to him.
"All right!" he shouted. "Nobody move, or I'll waste her right here!"
Everyone stood still.
Outside, however, Rosco and Enos scurried around to the open front door.
"Come on, you dipstick," Rosco said.
Enos handed Rosco the tear gas canister.
Marcello was leading Sarah to the door keeping MaryAnne's gun trained on Sarah. Eddie and Dan were coming around.
"Get up you idiots!" Marcello shouted. "Let's get the heck out of here."
MaryAnne saw Rosco down at the bottom of the doorway. She looked at Luke who nodded.
Rosco took the pin out of the canister and waited a moment before rolling it in. The canister stopped at Marcello's feet and the smoke began to spew out of the canister.
"What the...?" Marcello said.
MaryAnne and the boys took the oportunity to grab Sarah from Marcello and to subdue Marcello and his associates while Jesse led Sarah out of the house.
Enos and Rosco came in to make everything official, by arresting Marcello and his associates.
"Are you okay Sarah?" MaryAnne asked after everyone was outside the house.
"Yes. Oh thank you MaryAnne!" Sarah excalimed giving MaryAnne a hug.
"And you Dukes. Bless you," she said and gave the boys, Uncle Jesse and Daisy hugs.
Well, those FBI agents never did find the Hoover place but they did find the court house and they took Marcello, Eddie and Dan away but not before Boss returned the half of the $25,000 Marcello had given him.
The FBI commended the Dukes and MaryAnne and even Enos and Rosco for catching Marcello and Sarahs information was enough to put Marcello away for a long time.
Sarah decided to return to Finchburg County despite the Dukes and MaryAnnes persuasions to stay in Hazzard.
"No," Sarah said at the bus station where the Dukes and MaryAnne were seeing her off, "I think I need to go back home for awhile. Besides, my parents want to spend some time with their only grandchild." She held up Laura Ann.
"Well, you just remember you've got friends here in Hazzard," MaryAnne said.
Bandit added a bark.
"See?" she said.
Sarah giggled. "I won't forget any of you. Thank you so much." She gave everyone a hug and then picked up the car seat and got aboard the bus. As the bus pulled away, she waved and the Dukes and MaryAnne waved back with Bandit barking farewell.
When you make a friend in Hazzard County, you've made a friend for life.