This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any actual resemblance to persons or historical persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
The Dukes of Hazzard characters, settings, locales, ect. are owned by other entities who have not endorsed this fic nor have they given express permission for the character's use. Author makes not claims to these characters and is not making any profit from their use.
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© Copyright: 1996-2004. Lisa Philbrick
The Dukes of Hazzard
Hot Roddin' Dukes
By: Lisa Philbrick
A NASCAR engine brings more than just trouble to Hazzard.
Daisy Duke drove her white Jeep over a dusty road in Hazzard County,
heading toward Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane's house to pick up the Boar's
Nest's newest waitress.
Now, y'all may recall there's a new face in Hazzard County. Miss MaryAnne Coltrane.
Her arrival in Hazzard happened as only it could happen in Hazzard County and you may recall that her pretty blue car got busted up a little bit. Not havin' any money, MaryAnne had to get a job so she could pay Cooter to fix her car and believe it or not, ol' Boss hired her to work at the Boar's Nest.
MaryAnne stood by the mailbox in front of Rosco's house in jeans and a dark green and purple flannel shirt with a canvas tote bag in her hand. Her brown, lightly curly hair hung down around her shoulders.
Yep, that's her.
Did I mention she's related to Rosco?
Daisy brought the Jeep to a stop in front of MaryAnne.
"Hey there," Daisy greeted.
"Hi, Daisy," MaryAnne replied, climbing into the Jeep. "Thank you so much for picking me up."
"Oh, you're welcome. No problem at all."
Daisy pushed on the accelerator and the Jeep moved along the road.
"MaryAnne," Daisy said, looking at what MaryAnne was wearing, "you're not dressed."
"I know, that's what's in the bag. I'm gonna change when I get there. You gotta be kiddin' to think I'm gonna wear this outfit anymore than I have to."
* * *
Boss and Rosco were standing by the bar when Daisy and MaryAnne came in.
"Ah, there you are," Boss said. "Right on time--" He looked at MaryAnne. "MaryAnne, honey, you're not dressed appropriately."
"Well, that was somethin' I wanted to talk to you about. I don't mind wearin' the shorts but, can I keep this shirt on? Trust me, you'll appreciate me more if I keep this on instead of wearin' the halter."
Boss looked her up and down thinking it over. "Alright," he said, "you can wear that shirt. And you can use my office to change."
"Thank you," she said. She went to Boss's office and disappeared inside.
"Told you she wouldn't wear it," Rosco deadpanned.
"I don't understand why not," Boss said. "Daisy here will wear one."
"I think it because she's a little self-conscious," Daisy said.
"Yeah," Rosco said, "she ain't used to wearin' outfits like that."
After a few moments, the click from the office door opening made all three turn their heads.
MaryAnne poked her head out. One side of her mouth turned up into a smile and then she said, "Well, here goes nothin'."
She let the door open all the way and stepped out of the office. She stood in a pair of high heels, nylons, short white shorts and the dark green and purple flannel shirt she had on when she came in. At five foot six, a hundred and seventeen pounds,
MaryAnne filled the outfit well.
Boss and Rosco were looking at her legs.
"Well?" she prompted.
"MaryAnne, you look fine," Daisy said.
"Yeah," both Boss and Rosco said.
"Well, I feel ridiculous. Rosco, are you sure there ain't a law against shorts bein' this short?"
"Thanks a lot."
Daisy giggled as Boss approached MaryAnne.
"MaryAnne, honey, you look fine and you're gonna do fine. Now you and Daisy better get set up, we'll be opening soon."
"Okay." She followed Daisy to the store room.
Boss watched them go and then turned to Rosco. "How come your sister Lulu doesn't look like that?"
Well, seems like the beginning of a normal day, don't it? Of course, y'all know what 'normal' means in Hazzard County.
Meanwhile, a Ford pickup truck pulling a trailer with what appeared to be a car covered under a tarp, was coming over the county line from Hatchapie County.
The driver, a clean shaven young man with black hair and brown eyes, was unaware of the dumpy, early '70's Mustang that was following him.
About two miles down, coming from the other direction were Bo and Luke in the General Lee.
The rusty blue Mustang pulled up beside the truck and then cut in front of it, forcing the truck off the road. The fellow in the Mustang jumped out and ran up to the truck. He pointed a gun at the driver.
"Alright, Randy, get out. Now I gotcha."
Randy carefully opened the door. "Don't be stupid, Blake," he said and then slammed the door against Blake.
Blake fell backward and the gun dropped out of his hand. Randy jumped out of the truck and the two men took to fighting.
As Bo and Luke came down the road, they saw the two men scuffling in the dirt.
"Bo, look," Luke said.
Bo stepped on the General's accelerator and sped toward the two men. The General whistled "Dixie" as a warning.
Bo brought the General to a stop and he and Luke climbed out of the windows and proceeded to break up the fight.
"Hey!" Bo shouted as he grabbed Randy while Luke pulled Blake away. Blake swung at Luke, knocking him to the ground. He picked up his gun and ran to the Mustang. The car tore away.
"You okay, Luke?" Bo asked, releasing his grip on Randy.
"Yeah, I'm fine," Luke replied getting up off the ground.
"Bo and Luke Duke!" Randy exclaimed.
The boys looked at him. "Randy Henderson!" Bo exclaimed. They shook hands like old friends. "What the heck are you doin' here in Hazzard?"
"Well, I was on my way to see you guys, little did I know you were part of the welcoming committee."
Luke chuckled. "You're lucky we happened to be coming this way. What was that all about anyway?"
"Well, that, what I'm carrying and what I came to see you boys about are all related but it's gonna take some time to explain."
"Well, listen," Luke said, "why don't we help you get your truck back on the road and then we'll go to the farm and we can talk there."
"Yeah," Bo said, "and you can meet our Uncle Jesse."
"Sounds good to me," Randy said.
Well, the boys and Randy headed to the Duke farm. If y'all wonderin' what's under that tarp on that trailer, so was Rosco.
Rosco watched as the General Lee and the truck went by. The boys nor Randy saw the patrol car in the woods.
"Oo," Rosco said. "That fella looks like he's got two hundred bags of grits under there. I wonder what them boys are up to?"
He started the patrol car, carefully drove out of the woods and followed the truck.
The boys and Randy pulled into the yard of the farm while Rosco brought the patrol car to a stop on the hill over looking them. He watched as the boys climbed out of the General and Randy got out of the truck. All three went into the farm house.
“Doh,” Rosco said.
Looks like Rosco's gonna have to wait to see what's under that tarp.
Inside the house, Bo and Luke were introducing Randy to Uncle Jesse.
"Well," Jesse said shaking Randy's hand, "it's nice to meet ya, Randy."
"Mr. Duke, the pleasure is mine. I've heard a lot of good things about you from these boys."
Bo and Luke chuckled.
"You see, Uncle Jesse," Bo said, "Randy here builds racin' engines. He built the engine that was in the car me and Luke drove on the circuit."
"And that's why I'm here," Randy said. "Under that tarp out there is a car with my new prototype engine in it. Now I've built a lot of engines in my time, but I've never had one give me so many problems, non-mechanically speaking."
"Then that fella you were fightin' with..." Luke started to say.
"Was tryin' to steal it," Randy finished. "His name's Blake Harris. He's been tryin' to steal since before I even built it."
"Blake Harris?" Bo questioned. "Of Harris Racing?"
"The same. Only it's his father that owns the team, which is a legit team, but ol' Blake don't like playin' by the rules."
"If I recall, he wasn't exactly a sportsman like driver either," Luke said.
"So where do me and Luke fit into all this?" Bo asked.
"Well, I've poured every ounce of knowledge and every last dollar into that engine. If I don't get it certified by Nascar officials soon and get a team to use it, I'm gonna have to sell it. I need you two to help me test it out so I can get the certification."
"We'd be happy to help ya," Luke said.
"Yeah," Bo added.
"Great!" Randy exclaimed. "Well, come on, let me show you what you'll be working with."
The boys, Uncle Jesse, and Randy left the farm house. Up on the hill, Rosco watched was they came out and then Randy climbed up on the trailer and unsnapped the tarp from the bottom of the car. He pulled it off to reveal a shiny black 1985 Monte Carlo.
Bo let out a whistle.
"Hold on, you ain't seen the grand prize yet," Randy said. He pulled on the latch under the car to release the hood and opened it.
Bo and Luke climbed on the trailer to look.
"Wow," Luke said. "Would you look at that."
"Randy," Bo said. "It's beautiful."
"Well," Randy said modestly, "I try."
On the hill, Rosco picked up his binoculars to get a better look.
"Oo," he said, "look at that. That's a racin' engine. Wait 'til the Boss here's about this," he snickered.
Randy closed the hood after the boys and Uncle Jesse looked at the engine.
"That's a fine lookin' piece of machinery you got there, Randy," Uncle Jesse said.
"Thank you, sir."
"Well, I figure we can take it over to the fairgrounds and test it there," Luke said. "Just run it flat out."
"Alright," Randy said.
"Only you ain't goin' now," Jesse said.
"Why not?" Bo asked.
"'Cuz you ain't eaten nothin' since breakfast."
The boys chuckled.
"Hope you're hungry, Randy," Luke said.
Well, Rosco hightailed it over to the Boar's Nest to tell Boss about the racin' engine Randy had. Those two could mess up a party in paradise.
"Racin' engine?" Boss repeated skeptically. "Rosco, you wouldn't know a racin' engine from a tractor engine."
"Well, this fella had a pretty slick lookin' tractor," Rosco said. "Looks like those they run around that track at Talladega."
Boss looked at him. "You did see a racin' engine."
"Yeah. I'm tellin' ya Boss, them Dukes is up to somethin' and I'm gonna find out what it is."
"Yeah, alright," Boss said, already counting the dollar signs, "you get yourself back out to the Duke farm and keep eye on that engine."
"Right!" Rosco snickered. "I love it, I love it!"
Tryin' to find a car like the General Lee was like findin' a two-by-four in a hay stack. When Rosco returned to the Duke farm, Blake had found the farm as well, along with Randy's truck.
From the hill, Rosco watched as Blake left the old blue Mustang along the side of the road and snuck on to the Duke farm. He went up to the truck and got in.
Inside the house, the Dukes and Randy had just finished lunch and were talking when they heard the truck engine come to life. They all looked at each other for a split second and then bolted out of the house.
They came out in time to see Blake drive away.
"Come on, Randy, get in the General. We'll catch him," Bo said.
Rosco watched as the three got into the General and then tore out after Blake. He decided to join them.
After the truck and the General sped by, Rosco flew out onto the road, gumballs flashing and siren blaring.
Bo looked at his side mirror. "Rosco? Where'd he come from?"
"For once he's in the right place at the right time," Luke said.
"I just hope he does the right thing," Bo said.
The chase continued and Bo stayed with truck, with Rosco right behind.
"This road bends up ahead," Luke said. "Why don't we cut across Pruit's field and cut him off."
"You got it," Bo said and steered the General off the road. Rosco stayed with the truck.
Cutting across Pruit's field brought the General in front of the truck. Bo swung the steering wheel hard to the left, forcing the truck to slide to a stop.
The boys scrambled out of the General and got to Blake before he could take off. They pinned him against the truck.
"Aw right," Rosco said, running up to them. "What's goin' on here?"
"Rosco, this guy just tried to steal Randy's truck," Bo explained.
Rosco looked at Randy. "Is this your truck?"
"Yes, Sheriff, it is."
"Did he try to steal it?" Rosco gestured to Blake.
"Yes, he did. He tried to earlier today."
"Is that so?"
"Yes, that's so, Rosco," Bo spat. "Are ya gonna arrest him or are ya gonna stand here jabberin'."
"Bo, hush. Now I'm the Sheriff here and I'll decide if someone's gonna be arrested." He grabbed Blake by the arm. "Come on," he said, "you're under arrest." Rosco led Blake to the patrol car.
Bo laughed. "Well, Randy, this is your lucky day."
* * *
Later, at the courthouse, Blake stood in the holding cell eyeing Boss Hogg and Rosco.
Boss was rolling his cigar between his fingers. He looked at Blake.
"Why were you tryin' to steal that truck?" he asked.
"Ain't nonna yer business."
"When people try stealing other people's property I make it my business."
"Yeah," Rosco said, "he's the only one that steals anythin’ in Hazzard."
Boss shot him a look. "Would you be quiet," he spat. He looked back at Blake. "You're tryin' to get that racin' engine ain't ya?"
Blake regarded Boss suspiciously. "How'd you know that?"
"I know everything that goes on in Hazzard County."
"Yeah, he knows everything," Rosco snickered.
"I can maybe help you get that engine,” Boss said. “For a price."
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe fifty percent of your racin' contract?"
"Fifty percent?! No way."
"Well then, looks like I'll have to take that engine for myself. I'm sure it'll fetch a handsome price. You, meanwhile, will have to stay here in the pokey."
Blake paused while he reconsidered. "Thirty percent," he countered.
"Fifty," Boss said.
Blake fudged for a moment. "Alright," he said finally. "Fifty percent."
"Alright," Boss said. "Rosco, let him out of that cell, we have much to discuss."
Rosco snickered as he unlocked the cell door.
While Boss was conferrin' with that Blake fella, Randy and the boys had gone to the fairgrounds to test that prototype engine.
At the fairgrounds Randy had unloaded all of his testing equipment out of his pick up and the boys first tested the engine without driving the car. They tested everything from fuel injection and efficiency, air intake, the carburetor, oil flow and whatever else.
Now the Monte Carlo sat on the track with Bo at the wheel and Luke in the passenger seat.
"Okay, Bo," Randy said, "like Luke said earlier, just run it flat out. We're gonna see how this baby does."
Bo smiled. "You got it."
As Randy returned to his equipment, Bo started the engine and the Monte Carlo took off around the track.
After two laps Randy picked up the two-way radio. "Lookin' great here fellas. How about it?"
Luke picked up his two-way. "Randy, she runs like a dream. I think this engine runs better than the one in the car me and Bo drove!"
As the Monte Carlo zoomed around the track, Rosco was watching discreetly from the corner side of the grand stand.
He giggled then went to his patrol car and picked up the CB mike.
"This is Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane callin' his little fat buddy Boss Hogg. You got your ears on?"
"Rosco, I ain't your little fat buddy," Boss replied. "Now did you find them Duke boys?"
"Yeah, they're out here at the fairgrounds, just like you said."
"Okay, now you keep an eye on them, ya hear?"
"I will," Rosco snickered. "I'm gone."
After runnin' around the track for a couple of hours, the boys and Randy decided to take a break and headed to the Boar's Nest. But not before puttin' Randy's car in the barn.
As Bo, Luke and Randy filed into the Boar's Nest they were greeted by Daisy.
"Hey, Daisy," Bo greeted. "We want you to meet someone."
"Randy," Luke said, "this is our cousin, Daisy. Daisy, this is Randy Henderson. He's a friend of me and Bo's from the Nascar circuit."
"Hi," Daisy smiled.
"Well, hello," Randy replied. He looked her up and down then looked at Luke. "She's a lot prettier than I pictured."
Rosco, meanwhile, had arrived at the Boar's Nest and went to Boss's office by way of the side door.
"What are you doin' here?" Boss asked when Rosco entered. "You're supposed to be watchin' them Dukes and that Henderson fella."
"Well, whadaya think I'm doin' here?"
Boss paused. "Oh! You mean they're here?"
Boss got up from his desk and went to the door that led to the barroom. He opened it a sliver and watched as the Dukes and Randy found a table and sat down.
"Heh heh," Boss chuckled. He closed the door.
In the barroom, meanwhile, MaryAnne came up to the Dukes table.
"Howdy! Can I get you fellas somethin'?"
"Hey, MaryAnne," Bo greeted.
"Hi there," Luke said. "How's your first day goin'?"
"Not too bad, considerin' I've messed up four orders and have dropped six mugs of beer so far. Plus every guy that comes in here keeps starin' at me."
"Well, you're nice to look at," Bo said.
MaryAnne gave him a look. "Well, thank you, Bo," she said, "but I ain't used to it. I mean, guys in Finchburg County never paid any attention to me." She paused. "Of course, the fact I wore a deputy sheriffs uniform may have had somethin' to do with that."
"Deputy sheriff? You were a deputy?" Bo asked.
"Yep, for seven years. I even served in Atlanta for a year."
Bo smiled. "Deputy sheriff. Somehow I'm not surprised."
"Yeah," Luke chuckled. "Hey, maybe Boss will give a job with the Sheriff's Department."
MaryAnne laughed. "Yeah, right. Maybe when pigs fly. But listen, in order for me to keep this job, y'all gonna order some beer or what? And are ya gonna tell me who this fella is?"
Luke chuckled. "MaryAnne, this is Randy Henderson. He builds racin' engines. Me and Bo met him when we were on the circuit. Randy, this is MaryAnne Coltrane."
"Hello," Randy greeted.
"Hi, nice to meet ya." She smiled. "I'm assuming y'all want beer, seein' as that's all we have."
"Yeah," Bo said.
"Alright, be back in a bit." She headed to the bar.
"Now who was that?" Randy asked.
"That was the Sheriff's cousin," Bo replied.
"The Sheriff? The one who arrested Blake earlier?"
"Yep," Luke said. "She moved back here a couple of weeks ago. She and Rosco are so different yet they're so similar."
At this point, Boss Hogg came out of his office. He spotted the Dukes and Randy and made his way over to their table.
"Uh-oh," Luke said. Bo saw him too.
Randy turned to Boss. "Yes?"
"I'm J.D. Hogg, Police Commissioner of Hazzard County. My sheriff tells me somebody tried twice to steal your truck today." Boss's concern was that which only Boss could fake. "I'd hate to think anyone in Hazzard would try to do somethin' like that to
someone visitin' our fine community."
"Oh, it wasn't anyone from Hazzard, Mr. Hogg," Randy said. "It was Blake Harris and I was relieved when your sheriff happened to be around when Blake tried to steal it the second time."
"What could he possibly want with your truck?"
"It's not the truck he wants. It's what I was towin' behind it. I build Nascar engines and he was tryin' to steal my new prototype."
"Oh my," Boss said.
MaryAnne had returned at this point and placed the beers on the table.
"Those engines must cost a lot of money," Boss continued.
"About $30,000," Randy replied. "This engine cost me every last dime to put together. If I don't get it certified soon, I'm gonna have to sell it to someone who can because I need money more than anything."
"Well, what if I told you I know someone who could buy that engine off you for almost double what it's worth?"
Randy paused in consideration. He looked at Luke, who shook his head.
"It's a very tempting offer, Mr. Hogg, but I think Nascar will certify this engine as soon as I present my test results."
"Is certification really worth that much to ya?"
"Yes, it is."
Boss nodded. "Well, it's your decision. But if you should change your mind you let me know."
"Uh, I will," Randy said.
Boss returned to his office.
"Does Blake know you're broke?" Luke asked.
* * *
Later, as they left the Boar's Nest, Luke explained to Bo and Randy why he asked if Blake knew Randy was broke.
"If there's one thing Boss is constantly on the look out for it's an opportunity to make money. It's possible Boss has made a deal with Blake to get your engine."
"But how'd Boss know both Randy and Blake were here in Hazzard?" Bo asked.
"It's possible Rosco's been birddoggin' us," Luke said.
"Which would explain why he was in the right place at the right time when Blake tried to steal it again," Bo said.
"Exactly. Which also means that Rosco may have been watchin' when we were testin' out at the track and may have saw us put the car in the barn," Luke said.
"You don't think Boss would send Blake out to the farm to get the car do ya?" Bo asked.
"Probably not at the same time he was tryin' to buy it from Randy but we better get out there and make sure," Luke said.
The boys and Randy climbed into the General and tore off down the road.
When the boys got to the farm they found Randy's car and engine unharmed and untouched inside the barn.
"Well, we're in the clear for now," Bo said. "But how do we make sure Boss doesn't have the opportunity to steal it?"
"Easy," Randy said. He reached into the open engine compartment and pulled off the fuel line.
"She ain't goin' no where now," he said.
* * *
Later that evenin', while Randy was enjoyin' another meal at the Duke farm, Boss had Blake wait at the Boar's Nest for Rosco to pick him up and then take him to the Duke farm to get Randy's car. But none of that ever happened because Blake took a likin' to the beer and to someone else.
MaryAnne was talking to Daisy at the bar when Blake yelled for a third beer.
"Hey little lady, why don't you cut down on the socializin' and get me my beer!"
MaryAnne turned to him. "Alright, hold on a sec," she replied. "Sheesh."
Daisy filled up a beer mug and placed it on MaryAnne's tray. MaryAnne delivered it to Blake.
" 'sabout time. Now if you wanna socialize with somebody I sure wouldn't mind it bein' me."
"No, that's okay. I'm done socializin' for the day," she said and turned to walk away.
Blake grabbed her by the arm. "Aw, come on honey, we can at least get to know each other."
"I don't think so," MaryAnne said, pulling her arm away. "I tend to not get along well with people who yell at me and grab at me."
"Well, maybe I can make it up to ya." He grabbed her by the waist and made her sit on his lap.
"Hey, Mister, why don't you leave her alone," Daisy said.
"It's all right, Daisy, watch this," MaryAnne said.
"There now," Blake said. "Why don't you and me get a little acquainted?"
"Alright. Elbow, get acquainted with his mid-section." She jammed her elbow into his stomach.
Blake let go of MaryAnne and went tumbling to the floor. Everyone else cheered.
At this point, Rosco came in to see what was taking Blake so long. He saw Blake on the floor and watched him sit up and say to MaryAnne, "Oo, feisty. I like that in a woman." Blake got up off the floor and tried to grab at her again but she steered him into the bar where he crashed and ended up out cold on the floor.
The Boar's Nest erupted in cheers and whistles.
Rosco quickly stepped over to MaryAnne. "Are you ok? What the heck was he doin'?" he asked.
"I'm fine, but he was bein' stupid," she replied. "He kept grabbin' at me."
Blake slowly started to come to. Rosco grabbed him by the arm and pulled him up off the floor.
"You really done messed up now," he said. "It's bad enough that you would think of grabbin' at one of these two waitresses, but the fact you were grabbin' at my cousin, I oughta put you under the jail."
"She's your cousin?" Blake questioned.
"That's right," Rosco replied.
"She's also an ex-police officer," Daisy said.
"Yeah, lucky for you she didn't knock you right into the middle of next week," Rosco said. "Come on." He tigthened his grip on Blake's arm and escorted him out of the Boar's Nest.
* * *
Boss was in his office when Rosco and Blake returned to the courthouse.
He looked up when they came into the office.
"Oh, did you get it?"
"No," Rosco spat, "this dipstick had a few too many beers at the Boar's Nest and tried grabbin' at MaryAnne. If I had brought him out to the Duke farm to get the car he probably would have taken Jesse's pick up."
"Well, that's a shame," Boss said, "but ain't no use cryin' over spilt shine." He got up from the desk and approached Blake. "We'll just make another batch. Tell ya what, you come back here in the morning and we'll figure out how we're gonna get that car." He led Blake to door. "Just one thing though," Boss said before letting him out, "you stay away from Miss Coltrane ya hear?"
"Yeah," Rosco growled, if you call it growling.
Blake nodded. "You want me to come here tomorrow?" He pointed to the floor, gesturing that 'here' meant the courthouse.
"That's right," Boss said.
"Alright," Blake said. He left the office.
Boss shut the door and scurried back to his desk. He picked up the phone and started dialing.
"What are you doin' now, Boss?" Rosco asked.
"I'm gonna get that car."
* * *
Later that evening, after Daisy had returned home and everyone in the Duke house had gone to bed, a man snuck on to the Duke property and went to the barn.
As y'all probably figured, that's the fella Boss called.
He went into the barn and flashed a flash light on the Monte Carlo. He got in and took a moment to hotwire it, and then turned the ignition.
The car wouldn't start.
He flashed the light over his handiwork. He had the wires right so he got out and opened the hood. He immediately noticed the fuel line to the carburetor was missing. He left the barn and went to Randy's truck. He flashed the light into the cab and found the line on the front seat.
Now why do you suppose Randy left that there?
He grabbed the line through the open window and returned to the barn. In no time he had the fuel line on the engine and was back in the drivers seat. When he turned the ignition, the Monte Carlo roared to life.
Randy woke up when the engine turned over. He threw the covers off him and went to the window in time to see the Monte Carlo drive away.
"Dang," he whispered. He went to tell the Dukes.
Well, the Dukes figured Boss had the car, and the next mornin' went out lookin' for it. For all Boss knew he had the essential bargaining chip, but if he had thought twice about what he was gonna do to Blake, and what Blake would do in return, he'd think otherwise.
The following morning, Rosco pulled up in front of the police station and parked his patrol car. He got out, went around the other side of the car and opened the back door. Out came a black and tan German Shepherd police dog.
Nope, that's not Flash. That's Bandit, MaryAnne's dog.
The dog waited while Rosco removed Flash from the front seat.
"Okay, Bandit, come on," Rosco said. He headed into the police station with Bandit following.
When he got into the booking room, he found Boss and Blake standing quietly.
"Ah!" Boss exclaimed when he saw the German Shepherd. "Rosco, don't tell me you got another dog?"
"Oh, this ain't mine," Rosco said placing Flash on the bench. "This is MaryAnne's dog, Bandit." The dog obediently sat when Rosco tapped it's back. "He's a former police dog. Used to work for the Atlanta police."
"Oh," Boss said.
"Are we gonna see the car now?" Blake demanded.
"Oh, yeah," Boss said. "Sheriff, you have the key to the impound?"
"Yeah," Rosco snickered.
Boss led Blake and Rosco out of the booking room and down the hall to the impound.
Rosco unlocked the door and let Blake and Boss go in.
The Monte Carlo sat in the middle of the impound. Blake ran down the stairs like a kid on Christmas morning.
"Just a minute, Blake," Boss said. His face began to take on that Cheshire cat kind of look. "I regret to have to inform you that our original deal is void."
"What? Whadaya talkin' about?"
"Well, I said I'd help you get the car, I didn't say I'd do it for you. And since you decided to get drunk at the Boar's Nest last night and missed your chance to get the car, and because you grabbed at Miss Coltrane, I thought it fair to take the car for myself."
"What?! You can't do this! We made a deal, Hogg."
"Well, you can't tell me you didn't think of takin' the car and leavin' Hazzard to have it all to yourself, without givin' up half of your racin' contract?"
Blake looked at Boss. His silence was enough of an affirmative.
Boss nodded. "I thought so. Over the years I've come to learn that there is some truth to the saying 'do onto others before they do onto you.'"
Blake stormed back up the stairs. "Hogg, I can't believe you're doin' this. Now I'll admit I thought of takin' the car for myself, but when we made our agreement I was bound to hold up my end and I was gonna do it. You're gonna pay for this." He drew an angry breath. "Big time are you gonna pay for this." Blake stormed back down the hallway.
"Oo. He was mad." Rosco snickered. "I'm tellin' you Boss you got more twists and turns. That was slick though."
"Heh heh, yeah," Boss chuckled. "Okay, Rosco, lock this thing back up. We wouldn't want anyone to steal it now would we?"
* * *
Bo brought the General to a stop on a dusty road.
"I'm sorry, Randy," he said.
"That's alright, Bo. You boys have done all you can."
"Boss could have that car anywhere in Hazzard County. Or out of Hazzard," Luke said.
"I know it," Bo said.
Randy shook his head sadly. "I shouldn't have left the fuel line in my truck," he said. "That was dumb."
"What's done is done, Randy," Luke said. "You can't go blamin' yourself."
"Yeah, I guess."
* * *
Blake was so mad he had his foot to the floor of his Mustang and was nearly flying down the road. When he went past the Boar's Nest he brought the car to a sliding stop and sat in contemplation.
Now ol' Blake was mad enough at Boss to chew nails. And when he said he was gonna get back at Boss, he meant it. Of all the days for the Boar's Nest to close early...
Blake backed up the Mustang and parked on the far side of the parking area and waited.
It was a couple of hours later when closing time arrived. Blake had dozed off and woke up at the sound of car doors slamming and engines turning over. After everyone left, the only vehicle that remained was Daisy's Jeep.
Inside, MaryAnne was putting away the last of the clean glasses while Daisy was counting the days receipts.
Blake checked the number of rounds in the chamber of his gun. Satisfied there was enough, he closed the chamber and got out of the car. He walked over to the corner of the building and waited with gun in hand.
After a few moments, Daisy and MaryAnne came out of the Boar's Nest. As they went to the Jeep, Blake approached them coming up behind MaryAnne.
"Hold it right there, ladies," he said.
MaryAnne turned around to the gun that was pointing at her.
You know, I think MaryAnne is Finchburg County's answer to the Dukes. She sure gets in enough trouble.
Blake grabbed MaryAnne by the arm and pulled her away from the Jeep.
"Listen, Mister, if this is about what happened last night, I'm sorry I threw you into the bar," MaryAnne said. "Is this really necessary?"
"It ain't about that," Blake replied. "It's about your idiot Sheriff cousin and that double crossin' back stabbin' fat guy in a white suit." He aimed the gun at the front tire on the Jeep and pulled the trigger. Both Daisy and MaryAnne flinched and the Jeep
As Blake pulled MaryAnne toward the Mustang, all she could do was helplessly looked back at Daisy. When they got to the Mustang, Blake had her climb in through the driver door and then he followed in after. The Mustang tore out of the parking area.
Daisy grabbed the CB mike in the Jeep.
"Breaker, breaker. This is Daisy Duke callin' the sheriff. Oh Rosco, I hope you can hear me. Please, come in."
Rosco was out on patrol with Flash and Bandit. He picked up the CB mike.
"This is the Sheriff. What's wrong, Daisy?"
"Rosco, that fella that was grabbin' at MaryAnne last night just kidnapped her!"
"What?" he exclaimed. "Are you serious?"
"Yes. He took off in a blue Mustang down Mill Road toward Willow Creek. He shot out the tire on my Jeep so I couldn't go after him."
"Okay, Daisy, I'm gone." Rosco turned the patrol car around and sped off toward Mill Road.
The boys and Randy heard Daisy's call too, in the General.
"Blake drives a blue Mustang," Randy said.
"How the heck did MaryAnne get involved in this?" Bo asked.
"How do any of us get involved in anything?" Luke said. "Come on, let's give Rosco a hand."
Bo swung the General around. Luke picked up the CB mike.
"Daisy, this is Luke. Are you ok?"
Daisy had started trying to change the tire. She reached into the Jeep and grab the CB mike.
"Yeah, Luke, I'm fine. Did you hear what I told Rosco?"
"Yeah, we're on our way to help."
"As soon as I get this tire changed I'll join you."
"Okay." Luke took his finger off the talk button and then pushed it again. "Rosco, how you doin'?"
"I'm comin' up on them now. They're turning on to 72."
"Okay. Me and Bo will try to cut them off at the Pine Road Gully."
In the Mustang, MaryAnne looked out the back window.
"Well," she said. "There's my 'idiot Sheriff cousin.' If I know him as well as I think I do, at this moment he's thinkin' what an honor it will be to use you as the first cornerstone for the new county jail."
"Not likely," Blake said. He pulled the steering wheel hard to the left and turned the Mustang completely around. The pony car sped off as Rosco flew past.
Rosco turned the patrol car around and sped after the Mustang. He picked up the CB mike.
"You can forget Pine Road Gully, Luke. They're headin' back toward the Mill Road junction."
Back at the courthouse in town, Boss looked at the CB set. He had heard the exchange earlier but didn't actually listen to it. He pushed the talk button on the base of the mike.
"Rosco, what the heck's goin' on out there?"
"I'll tell you what's goin' on, you little meadowmuffin," Rosco spat. "That Blake fella just kidnapped MaryAnne."
"He kidnapped her. And I think you can guess why."
Boss paused a moment before answering. "Aw geez, and I thought he only acted stupid when drunk. Rosco, I swear I never meant for something like this to happen."
"Hush! I don't wanna hear it. It's one thing when your greed gets you and me in trouble, but MaryAnne? I oughta knock you into the middle of next YEAR!"
"What the heck are they talkin' about?" Bo asked. Luke shrugged and shook his head and then pushed the talk button on the mike.
"What did Boss do, Rosco?" he asked.
There was a brief silence before Rosco answered. "Boss Hogg made a deal with Blake to help get that racin' engine from that friend of yours, only Blake got drunk at the Boar's Nest last night and was grabbin' at MaryAnne. So Boss got somebody else to steal the car and then told Blake the deal was off and that he was gonna keep the car for himself."
"So Blake kidnapped MaryAnne thinking he can exchange her for the engine possibly?" Luke said.
"Yeah. I figure since he knows she's my cousin he probably thinks it will give him some leverage."
"Gee, Boss, you're not protesting any of this," Luke said.
"That's because Rosco's right," Boss admitted. "I swear I never thought Blake would do something like this. Now if you boys can help Rosco get her back I'll, I'll--"
"Give Randy back his car and engine?" Luke suggested.
Boss fudged a bit. "Give Randy back his car and engine," he said.
"Alright," Luke said. "Daisy, are you rollin' yet?"
"Sure am, honey. What do want me to do?"
"We're gonna try to box them in at the junction. Is that alright, Rosco?"
"Yeah," he replied.
"Okay, Luke, you got it," Daisy said.
Well, here we go. The boys were comin' from the east, Daisy from the north, and Rosco was followin' Blake in from the south. I sure hope this works.
The boys reached the junction first and Bo turned the General to block the road. Then Daisy arrived turning Dixie to block the road.
"All your's, Rosco," Luke said.
Blake didn't know what to do when he saw the General and the Jeep. He slammed the brakes and swerved the Mustang off the road. The car failed to stop as the brakes locked up and continued to move through the brush and bushes.
"The creek!" Rosco exclaimed. He kept after the Mustang until he saw it shoot off the six foot cliff and into Willow Creek.
MaryAnne could only hang on for the ride. The Mustang slammed into the murky water splashing it a good ten feet away from the car. Water came gushing in through the vents at her feet and then through the open windows.
The boys, Randy and Daisy joined Rosco at the edge of the cliff in time to see the car sink fast.
"Holy smokes," Luke exclaimed. He and Bo jumped down from the short cliff and dove into the creek.
"Oh, Rosco," Daisy said. Rosco anxiously watched for MaryAnne to break the surface. Bo and Luke swam toward the sinking Mustang. Bo went to the passenger side to find MaryAnne while Luke went to grab Blake who had come to the surface.
Bo drew a deep breath, held it, and then disappeared under the surface of the water.
"Come on, MaryAnne," Rosco prayed. After a moment that lasted longer than Rosco would have liked, the blonde head of Bo came to the surface followed by the dark brown one of MaryAnne.
"There she is!" Rosco cheered. Flash and Bandit started barking from the window of the patrol car.
The boys swam to the shore with Blake and MaryAnne. Luke got there first with Blake, and Rosco had his handcuffs ready when the disgruntled race driver came out of the water.
"Err, I’m gonna put you under the jail," Rosco growled as he slapped the cuffs on Blake. He then turned to MaryAnne as she stepped out of the water.
"Oh boy," she said, "that was enough excitement for one day for me." She pushed some of her wet tangled hair off her face.
"Are you allright?" Rosco asked. "What were you trying to do, give me a heart attack or something? How come you were down there so long?"
"My dumb shoe got caught on the ripped seat. I had to unbuckle it to get my foot free." She looked down at her foot that was without it's white heeled sandal, then at Rosco. He was still looking at her in concern.
"Rosco, I'm okay," she said, giving his arm a reassuring grip. "Just remind me when we get back to town to ask Boss for combat pay."
She should. Hazzard County waitresses sure have to put up with a lot.
Well, with MaryAnne safe and sound, Boss let Randy take back his car and engine but not with out makin' another offer to buy it.
Randy thanked the boys for they're help and also apologized for all the trouble he brought with him.
"Don't worry about it," Luke said. "Just be thankful everything turned out for the better." He, Bo and Randy were outside the farmhouse, by Randy's truck which was packed up with all of his equipment and the Monte Carlo.
"Yeah," Bo said. "With Blake in jail now, you shouldn't have any trouble gettin' that engine certified."
"Yeah, you're right," Randy said. "I guess comin' to Hazzard was the right thing to do." He smiled.
The boys chuckled.
"Listen," Luke said, "next year we want to hear that that engine won the Daytona 500."
"Oh, you will," Randy said. "You will."
Randy shook hands with Bo and Luke.
"Thanks again, fellas. I really appreciate it."
"You bet," Luke said. "You take care now."
Randy went to his truck and got in. He started the engine and waved before driving off.
That engine oughta win at Daytona, especially after all it went through in a place called Hazzard County.